Anything But A Mattress Store…

Tuesday, October 2nd, 2007

Once I lived across the street from a “tobacco” shop. I can’t say it was a big surprise when a “going out of business” sign with a Grateful Dead sticker on it appeared in the window one day. It was a time of great excitement for my roommates and I. None of us were all that into “tobacco” and we were excited to see what would move in across the street. Would it be a great sandwich shop? A bookstore?? An arcade?! A waterpark?!?!!?

After months of construction, the plywood on the windows finally came down, awnings went up, and we were left with… a Sprint Store. A Sprint Store! I guess there are people who go to such places for their Borg implant bluetooth devices, but I was still rockin’ the land line at the time — rockin’ it hard. Oh how I missed the old bong shop.

Recently signs went up on the pizza place across the street from my house announcing that they are moving and once again I find myself excited by the possibilities. You may be thinking that I’m crazy for not wanting a pizza place right outside my front door. I’m not. Here are 4 reasons:

  1. There’s also Chicago’s Pizza and Giordano’s very very nearby, offering much tastier pizza.
  2. I’ve never actually seen anyone buying pizza there.
  3. It seems they have a nasty habit of dumping grease directly in the sewer.
  4. There’s a Donkey Kong Jr. machine in there that drives me crazy because I suck so bad at Donkey Kong Jr.

The thing is, my neighborhood is so dang awesome that I can’t think of anything I really need. Maybe I’ll be pleasantly surprised. Maybe it will be a branch of my weird bank. Or maybe someone will bring back Photon. A kid can dream…

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